So I’ve been up to a lot of stuff these past few months, most of them quite bad experiences.
I ended up dislocating my kneecap early in the morning 20.10.19 whilst in the bathroom and the feeling of it all was so intense, having to yell my better half’s name across the apartment to get help, and him running to me, that was scary. I then told him to go get my phone so I could call emergency services and then I relocated my kneecap myself while he wasn’t in view, and I remember thinking that he shouldn’t see this and that I wanted to spare him for it… I’m kinda happy that I could do that myself, so I didn’t need the hospital staff to do it, but I cannot describe the actual pain of dislocating a kneecap, it’s insane.
The first picture is a few hours after the dislocation and relocation of my kneecap.
As if that weren’t enough, my mum was rushed to the ER due to her eyes, she had pressure build up, due to dialated pupils, she had been to see an eye doctor who had given her some eye drops to examine her eyes and she had a very bad reaction.
The pressure in both her eyes was at max buildup at 77, that is insanely dangerous and not healthy at all for your eyes or your brain for that matter, due to the pressure buildup being located behind the eye sockets and therefore also close to the brain.
The last few months has been pure hell, I haven’t been able to walk much due to my insanely swollen knee – no bruising though! I had to go on sick pay and postpone my internship too, which sucks so much!
I am doing physiotherapy exorcises every day at home, and I’m also attending this group workout session every Monday morning from 8 – 9, so I can get my leg back to normal.
To be honest, I had my leg in a Don Joy brace for almost a full month, with a 30 degree bend as my only movement, so I lost a lot of muscle in my leg and also my tendons have shortened, first I couldn’t bend my leg at all, but now it’s mainly straightening my leg that’s impossible, hence why I can’t walk properly, it just sucks.. I’m dead scared of dislocating it again, the pain was so unreal and intense.. But there is like a 30% possibility of this happening again, so I need to always keep working on my legs and gain muscle to support my kneecap, so it won’t happen again.
I was on some heavy painkillers, Tramadol 100mg x3 a day, that dose I honestly didn’t even take! I took half, which is 50mg, but only once or twice a day, just to endure the pain the first week or so. But those pills are horribly addictive, so I refused to take them for long and I skipped those pretty fast. I only take regular painkillers if needed now, I have seen too many people addicted to Tramadol.
My mom underwent eye surgery and got her eye lenses removed and replaced on both her eyes due to cataract. The whole procedure was done on a single week with multiple hospital visits, a lot of medicine to keep any pressure buildup down and two surgeries, which I attended -even though I was limping around like an idiot and people thought I was the one needing some sort of surgery… My mum is thankfully doing much better now, and is happy, healthy and pain free -and with no side effects of the pressure buildup in her eyes. Her eye lenses were stiff due to the cataract and that left her with a very small “frame” in her eyes, which then blocked the drainage in both her eyes completely when she got the eye drops at her eye doctors, so he could check her eyes, which is normally a routine thing.
The whole thing could have ruined her vision and created chronic glaucoma, which would have impaired her vision a lot.. But she got a clean bill of health and could all finally relax!
I am currently lying in bed, just took a 600mg painkiller to dull the ache in both my knees – one due to kneecap dislocation (patellaluxation) the other due to strain, cause of my inability to walk properly, therefore I lean a lot on my left knee.
I got the Don Joy off after almost a month, I donated it to Africa…. I’m happy to be rid of that thing, and now I have a kneecap support band that is supposed to lock the kneecap in place, until you gain enough muscle to not dislocate the kneecap once more. The situation is honestly horrible, I’m usually the nurse, not the patient! I hate being the vulnerable one, I’m a good nurse but a horrible patient.
Last week (Thursday – 28.11.19) I had what’s called electro therapy, that really sucked… It was supposed to awaken my big muscle in my upper thigh, so it could help me straighten my leg out again. For almost ten whole minutes I had a jolt of electricity every 10 seconds going through my thigh, but no much response at all, only a tiny little visible reaction, I’m supposed to have more electro therapy today, so wish me and my leg luck, I need to see results now!
I’ll see if I can get some proper pictures of the electro therapy today, maybe even do a whole “how to” on physio for weak knees, it might just help someone else out, which is somehow a bit comforting to know.
I’m going to try and relax a bit now before getting ready for today’s session of pain haha, I’m almost used to the torture by now, but somehow it’s also comforting, I know it needs to hurt to get better, especially when it’s muscles and short tendons! I’m glad that my education have at least prepared me a little for this entire disaster, both my mum and her surgery and also my setback with my knee. I have learned a lot recently, but it’s from another point of view -The patient and the family of the patient.
We are very much at the mercy of our medical staff, one wrong step can make a snowball effect, very much like my mother’s current medical history. It is also human for the medical staff to once in a blue moon make the wrong decisions, and it’s all about your own personal coping mechanisms and about the backup from family and friends that sees you through everything. I for one, found out how cool my brain is during the incidents, and then the all crippling shock of it all that comes afterwards. But we have endured, we have prevailed my family and I.
I hope that year 2020 is going to be a much better year for us, we have had a lot of bad luck this year, not just these two incidents, but in our entire family as well. But we cope and we will get stronger from going through this.
I’m proud of myself for doing what I did during my kneecap dislocation, for stepping up and relocating it myself, for thinking “Damn I don’t want my better half to see my knee like this, this is bad!” -I have no clue as to how I did what I did, but I managed, I have a new sense of respect for myself!