I am not good enough.
What a shitty feeling to have.. Doing your all, but not being good enough, trying to help, trying to reach her, soothe her, help her through something so dark and scary, that I would never be able to understand.. But I couldent, I feel imperfect, and it sucks. Being a friend means to be able to comfort and help, no mather what and I just couldent, thats just not good enough, far from. I feel like the worst friend ever right now, and im worried for her, worried for how she is and if she can rise up by herself now. I wish that everything just worked out yesterday, like I had hoped. This is my childhood friend, we talked about everything and still does, she helped me through so much sorrow and heartbreak, and she has been so strong for me, and now I cant repay her. She is in this dark hole, and I cant reach her, I cant understand, but I wish I could! Life is too short for feeling like shit, and I wish it wouldent be like this, that I was a better friend, good enough to mend it all, and wipe away every tear this girl cried, cause she means everything to me, and the pain she alredy suffered is something I would never wish for my worst enemy to go through, but she has, and its not fair…. I wish I could be her shrink, her shoulder to cry on, her rock and her protector, but I just cant.. I just have to face it, I aint good enough.
Im sorry, I really am..